Is Courtesy Dead?

It used to be that a cell phone ringing during a movie would result in someone scrambling to dig out the offending object and turn if off as fast as possible while shrinking in their seat in shame. Not any more, more often than not the reaction is not only answer the phone but have a conversation right there in the theater.

And, it doesn't stop there. Recently, I was attending a workshop and had the misfortune of sitting front of two women who carried on their own conversation off-and-on through the entire 45 minute panel discussion. To say that it was distracting (and irritating) is an understatement. Just as I was getting used to the intermittent whispering I started to hear a low-pitched, but completely understandable conversation on the other end of the row behind me. After a few seconds I realized I could only hear one side of the conversation. Confused, I glanced behind me to see a woman on her cell phone. Now, it's worth noting that this was not a large meeting, only about 60-70 people, so it's not like she was in an anonymous attendee in a sea of hundreds (not that would be okay, either, but...). I'm sorry, I was stunned. She made no effort to leave the room, just sat in the middle of the audience and carried on her conversation. (By the way, this was NOT a meeting of transplant surgeons.)

It's bad enough to deal with the constant whispered side conversations during luncheon presentations, but to talk on your phone during a workshop? I just don't get it.

Although on the subject of luncheon faux pas, nothing (I hope) will ever beat a fund raising lunch I attended, populated largely by the "ladies who lunch" crowd. The wine was flowing and the crowd kept up a restaurant level din throughout not one, but TWO speakers. I wanted to crawl under the table....or start throwing silverware at socialites. Fortunately, everyone did shut up when the keynote speaker was introduced.

So, what is going on here? Have we completely the concept of commont courtesy.

Nonsene Tips

This is much a request as it is a tip. When driving in the city, or really anywhere with oncoming traffic and/or cars in front of you, use your low-beams, please. I know your "brights" make it easier for you to see, but you are blinding the people in front you.

More Puppies

Yes, I did it again. I have more foster puppies. Cody (top) and Jake (bottom).

They're eight weeks old and absolutely adorable. Mom is a "red dog" according to the vet who was taking care of her and the dad appears to be a husky/shepherd mix. They're very sweet and started out pretty shy, but they're getting bolder every day. {When we first got home they promptly ran under the car and refused to come out. Eventually, we made it inside thanks to some well-timed assistance (Thanks Kim).}

They are settling in nicely and picking up house training quickly, something for which I am extremely grateful. Don't get me wrong, there are still occasional accidents, but they are few and far between. Nothing like the three rolls of paper towels a day I was going through with the last crew. They're even learning to walk on the leash, although that's been pretty comic, since they're in that stage of puppydom where EVERYTHING is a big and scary monster.

Attempts at Economizing

When I first got laid off I evaluated my shopping list for some "easy" ways to save money and realized I have quite a collection of high end beauty products. So, I started to look for some possible substitutions. The results, so far, have been mixed, but I can report nothing catastrophic has happened....yet.

Moisturizer: I traded my Prescriptives moisturizer ($65) for Alba Green Tea and Aloe moisturizer ($15). Recommended by SELF Magazine.

Verdict - I like the Alba product and I'll keep using it, probably at night, but I will go back to Prescriptives at some point because it feels better under makeup.

Shampoo: Traded my Biolage hydrading ($20) shampoo for the ($8) Kiss My Face "Whenever" shampoo. Recommended by SELF.

Verdict - Not a big fan. I like that it doesn't have sulfates, so it's environmentally friendly. It might be all in my head, but my hair seems less cooperative and kind of dry, I've since tried Kiss My Face's "Miss Treated" and I like it a lot better. Whether or not it will be a permanent switch is still up in the air.

Mascara: Trading my Chanel mascara ($28) for CoverGirl Remarkable mascara ($8) Recommended by Rhonda.

Verdict - I like the CoverGirl and I'll keep it for casual use, but I still prefer the Chanel. It's fabulous. I have tried Diorshow Iconic (Sephora $27) which I really like, but I don't think the $1 difference really counts as economizing.

Hand Lotion: Trading my L'Occitane Dry Skin Hand Cream (20% shea butter) ($10) for Eucerin($.99). A random "brain" storm in the trial size aisle at Target.

This one didn't even last the first few uses. I'm back on L'Occitane.

Eye Cream: Origins Plantidote™ Mega-Mushroom Eye Serum ($43.50 - but I had a free sample) for Chanel Precision Energizing Multi-Protection Eye Cream - daytime ($60) and Chanel Precision Structuring Anti-Wrinkle Firming Eye Cream - nighttime ($80) {In my defense, I got this one as free sample and have yet to actually buy it} Now using Botanics Eye and Lip Correction Serum ($14) recommended by SELF.

Verdict - Was not impressed by Plantidote, especially given the cost. The Botanics stuff is okay, but I WANT MY CHANEL BACK!

The biggest single victory, however, has been paper towels. A devoted fan of Bounty I ran in to a little issue when my first foster puppy arrived on the scene, but that was nothing compared to what happened when the three boys arrived. I was going through at least three rolls of paper towels a day (AT LEAST!). I tried the bargain paper towels, but you don't save much when you have to use so much more to get the job done. Enter Target brand papertowels. They ROCK! Every bit as good as Bounty without the brand name price. Thank you Real Simple magazine for the tip.

Overall, my attempts at economizing have been kind of fun, even if they haven't all been rousing successes. Since I am still unemployed I will continue to work through my stash of samples and the drug store recommendations in my stack of magazines, updates to follow, I'm sure.

Nonsense Tip of the Week

When teaching puppies to walk on a leash, start out with one puppy at a time. For the first walk, do not attempt to walk all three puppies at once. Trust me.

40 Things to Do When You Turn 40

When I first bought this book my intention was to do each of the 40 things and then post about them, but after reading just one, I've revised my plan. I'll commit to reading each essay and posting on it, but I'm not going to commit to doing each thing.

I'm jumping around and the first essay I up was out of Section Five - The Substance of Style; David Tutera's "Throw Yourself A Fabulous Party". The opening directive, "plan a celebration, large or small with the people who mean the most to you in a location that is special..." was universal and great advice. But, that was pretty much the end of the relatable portion of the program. The rest chronicled the 40th birthday party David threw for himself in Tuscany. The celebration kicked off with hors d'oeuvres poolside followed by dinner in wine cellar and included a tour of Sienna, shopping and dinner in the town's piazza and culminated on the final night with a banquet at twelfth-century castle which included fireworks. The party truly sounded fabulous, inspired and I'm sure the guests had a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

While the piece did offer some translatable advice like "remember to touch all five senses" and "capture the imagination of your guests", I can't really say it left me inspired, a little bit jealous, yes, inspired; not so much. No offense intended, David, but I don't need advice on how to throw myself a party with a budget well in to the six figures. I'm quite confident I could knock that one out of the park. Practical tips applicable to those of us without black American Express cards would have been a lot more useful. I guess I'll have to buy one of your books for that. (After checking out your web site, I probably will buy the books, they look fantastic.)

Fortunately, for me, my friends threw me a fantastic 40th birthday party. I have promised to fly them all to Italy…right after I win the lottery.

Gnome Adventures

Gnome started collecting frequent flyer miles this February. He started out the month hanging in the OC and enjoying the sights on Huntington Beach Pier.

Then he jetted off to Park City to enjoy the snow.

Unfortunately, he didn't get to hit the slopes. I forgot to bring him the first day and after a rather spectacular fall never made it back to the slopes. Fortunately, no permanent damage was done so there's always next year. However, Gnome has requested pants before the next ski trip.

The Jitters

I came down with an awful case of the jitters tonight, which isn't surprising considering I chased several glasses of wine with a cappuccino, which was delicious, by the way. However, anyone who knows me knows that I should NEVER be caffeinated. Anyway, as I'm bouncing off the walls I happened upon a memory from a million years ago.

The crazy, can't-sit-still feeling took me back to the early eighties when I felt this way often, no caffeine required, but I had a beautiful outlet for it . (I may have recognized I was lucky at the time, but I didn't realize how lucky.) When the jitters hit, back in the day, I just whined to my mother until she gave in and drove me to the barn (thanks mom, 15 minutes each way with two young kids wasn't exactly quick and easy, especially considering that you had to do that round trip drive twice every time).

Once I got there, I saddled up the horse and went out into the desert. Lucky for me the tanks (yes, actual tanks, please see previous comments about being a military brat) created a perfect track, no holes to worry about. So, we could run as fast and as far as possible until we were both tired, although I usually pooped out before she did. It was truly amazing.

I'm not sure I can adequately express the sense of freedom inherent in giving a young horse it's head and hanging on for dear life. Trust me, even an experienced rider can't think about much other than staying on at that speed. The only fly in the ointment was the day we rounded a bend and came face-to-face with a tank. Even now, I'm not sure who was more surprised, me, the horse or the poor kid driving the tank. Still, those crazy afternoons were an outlet I'd give anything to duplicate these days. Alas, it's water under the bridge. Besides, I don't think it's possible to completely recapture that sense of freedom when you're paying your own medical expenses. Growing up is a bitch.

Nonsense Tip of the Week

Always open a new bottle of club soda over the sink (or a bathtub or some other device with a drain). It will always explode. ALWAYS.

Confessions of a Shopaholic

Delightful, funny, endearing...and the clothes... (and the SHOES), the clothes! it's all a nice bit of escapist fun. This movie is proof that I should ignore movie critics. The reviews were so bad that I didn't even want to see the movie, even though I loved the books. (A bit of advice about the books, they're a lot of fun, but don't read them back-to-back, too much Rebecca Bloomwood can wear on you.)

I have to disagree with the reviews I read. I thought the movie was a great. Yes, Becky does do a lot ridiculous things and doesn't always (often) make good choices, but it's all somehow lighthearted fun. Her heart is in the right place, even if she's frequently (extremely) short-sighted. While Becky's outfits leaned a little too far towards Carrie Bradshaw's costumes (excuse me, outfits), for me, they were still beautiful.

I wish I'd paid more attention to who was writing all those bad reviews, because they clearly missed the point. As for the "unfortunate timing" of the movie's release, in the midst of the worst economic crisis ever (whether or not that is true remains to be seen, but that's sure the story all the talking heads are selling on television), making the movie "out of place" and "grating" (I'm quoting the aforementioned reviewers.); there was only one line that really bothered me during the whole movie, as far as the current economic crisis goes, and for the life of me, I can't remember what it was.

I think the biggest point the haters missed is that this is FICTION, not a how-to-manual. Lighten up and enjoy the ride.

Isla Fischer is delightful. Krysten Ritter is wonderful as Suze, I absolutely loved her, in spite of the fact that the character is completely WRONG visa vie the book. I also really enjoyed John Goodman and Joan Cusak (brilliant) despite the complete remake of Becky's parents. All of the casting was brilliant, actually, except for Luke. I had a totally different image of Luke, it just never really worked for me, however, I like Hugh Darcy enough that by the next movie (please keep making them) I'm sure I'll be totally over it. Overall, I found the (huge) discrepancies between the book and the movie to be confusing, but I'm not going to say anything more about that, except that they were jarring and significant enough to have me very confused as to how they're planning to plot the sequels.

My advice, definitley worth seeing.

The International

Typically, I enjoy international intrigue movies, the more complicated the plot, the better. But, while The International had promise, the truth is, I fell asleep twice (at least) in the middle of the afternoon. Not sure what else there is to say after that. Sorry Clive.