Thursday, February 25, 2010

Gym Floor Fashion

My approach to workout wear can be summed up by the three Cs - Clean, Covered and Comfortable, so I make no claims at being a gym fashionista. After some recent sightings I feel compelled to make a few suggestions.

Things NOT to wear when working out at the gym:

1) Cowboy boots. I know we're in Texas, but cowboy boots just look silly when you're using the weight machines.

2) False eye lashes (yeah...false eyelashes at the gym...every day)

3) Hoop earrings big enough to double as bracelets, for members of the WWF

4) Aqua socks, especially the ones with the little toes. They're just creepy. Put on some shoes.

5) Skirts. Yes, those cute new running skirts are all the rage. And, if you want to wear them running, more power to you. But, may I suggest that the weight room is not place for a skirt. Some of those machines contort one into interesting positions not really conducive to wearing a skirt. Of course you (and you know who you are) may not care considering you did that old P.E. standby "The Mountain Climber" in the middle of the workout room in your skirt. (Seriously, I have now seen you at an angle that should be reserved for the man in your life and your gynecologist and no, the matching bloomers didn't excuse it.) {For those of your unfamiliar with the mountain climber, think an aerobic version of Yoga's downward facing dog.}

And while we're talking about what you should wear, can I add shorts that cover ALL of your butt. I don't care how rockin' your body is, I don't want to look at your cheeks hanging out of the bottom of your "shorts".

Anyway, just a few suggestions.....


Bossy Betty said...

OH dear! Your list of "What Not to Wear" pretty much describes what I wear to the gym! I find the cowboy boots and false eyelashes really come in handy for getting people off the treadmill I want. They just sort of back away when they see me coming.

Trix in the City said...

What I always hated about going to the gym in the mornings was all the naked ladies that walked around after their shower. You're not at home... put a flippin' towel on! ISH!!!!

KB said...

Never thought about that approach, Betty. I think I will wear my cowboy boots to the gym. Maybe I'll finally get a real shot at the leg press machine!